How to Choose The Right Preschool

by Dr. Andria Glasser Das

Did you think it was hard choosing a college? How about buying a house? Choosing a job? Choosing a spouse?

Well, if you have a toddler, it may seem like none of those compare to what it's like choosing a preschool. How hard can it be, you might ask, to find a decent place for a three-year old to spend a little time with other kids, get acclimated to being without you for a short while, learn to take direction from another adult, and give you a much needed break? If you're not very picky, it isn't hard at all. Simply choose the one that's the most convenient. Or the one that your neighbor sends her kids to. Or the one that everyone who's anyone goes to. Does it need to be more complicated than that?

Not necessarily. It may be that this program turns out to be a great fit for your family in every way. If so, you're lucky. There are a great many attributes on which preschools differ making comparing schools a confusing and frustrating endeavor. I know many parents that get in a panic about the preschool selection process before their child even reaches preschool age. Unfortunately, many of them are focused on the wrong problem. They are more concerned about their child getting into a "desirable" school, than they are about determining what makes a school desirable for their family. It's a bit like going on a job interview and being so concerned about making sure they like you, you forget to ask the questions that will help you decided if you like the job. The fit has to be a good one for the experience to be a good one.

So, what is the right approach to choosing a school so that you minimize frustration, panic and bad choices? First of all, I think you need to be aware of the variables on which schools differ and decide which ones are important to you. These will be your guidelines for selection. Then visit schools that fit the profile you've developed and see how they feel to you and to your child. You may find after a few visits, that things you thought were important are not and things you hadn't considered are. Keep an open mind, but also remember that your initial criteria were chosen for a reason. To help you through this process, here is a list of questions to ask yourself before you start looking, some variables to consider, and what you should look for on visits.

First Steps

1) Why are you considering preschool at this time? Because everyone else is? Because you know your child needs more than you can offer at home? Because you need to go back to work? Make sure it is for the right reasons. There may be other options that work better for you and your child.

2) How much preschool does your child need? How many days? All day or part day?

3) Potty training. If your child is not potty trained, don't assume he or she will be when September rolls around. Find a school that can accommodate children in diapers or Pull-ups.

Variables to consider

1) Proximity to home work.

2) Religious affiliation--yours or another. You may not think this matters to you, but you might feel differently in the long run.

3) Ethnic/cultural diversity.

4) Philosophical orientation (Developmental, Academic, Waldorf, Montessori, etc.)

5) Approaches to discipline. Do they utilize time-outs? A "let the children work it out themselves" approach? No school will admit to using a punitive approach to discipline, but many do. This is something you will need to visit the school several times to determine.

6) Accreditation and licensing (check with Community Care Licensing for history of complaints).

7) Student/Teacher Ratio (state limit is 12/1) and class size.

8) Teacher/assistant teacher qualifications, turnover, CPR training.

9) Facility--cleanliness, condition, space, equipment materials.

10) Security of building & play yards.

11) Environmental factors--safety of neighborhood, unsafe traffic near school, pollutants from nearby businesses.

12) Does your child have special needs? Can they be accommodated at this school?

Visits

1) Go as many times as possible before you make your decision. Any place can look great once. You need several visits to really get a feel for the school.

2) Are the kids happy? Sick? Is it chaotic or orderly? How are fights or misbehavior handled? How are kids handled if they're hurt or sad?

Lastly, here are some "bottom lines" things to remember to put the challenge of finding a preschool in perspective: * Know your child. Know yourself. What does your child really need? What do you really want for your child? * No place is perfect. Prioritize your wishes. Ultimately, you have to go with your gut.

* There is no "best" school. No place is right for every family. Listen to recommendations of others, but always make the decision that is right for you.

* Don't let fear of not getting in to a "good" school rush your decision. * If there is a school you really love but it is full, keep calling. Most places have spaces open up as September approaches.

* If after your child has been at the school for a while, you feel you made the wrong choice, don't feel "stuck." Better to take them out of a bad place than have them continue.

* It's only preschool! Good luck!