Preventing and Recognizing Eating Disorders in Your Child

by April Caires

Eating disorders are more prevalent in females, mostly in adolescence or post-adolescence--this we know. But did you know that these disorders have been reported in children as young as 3? Are you aware that over 40 percent of 1st to 3rd graders want to be thinner, while nearly half of all 9 to 11-year-olds are "sometimes" or "very often" on a diet? What is the root of this problem? How can parents tell if their child is developing a distorted body image or unhealthy eating patterns, and what can we do about it?

Americans' obsession with dieting is notorious. But as adults, it's important to recognize that our waistline woes contribute to a generation of kids that is focused on thinness rather than health, and deprivation rather than nourishment.

On any given day, 25 percent of American men and 45 percent of American women are on a diet, according to the National Eating Disorder Association. All this dieting may be sending the wrong message to kids, says Dr. Gabrielle Taylor, a Pasadena psychologist whose practice includes patients suffering from eating disorders. "What's implied in dieting is that it's a temporary thing," says Taylor, "[A diet] is going to come to an end, and then what?"

A permanently healthy lifestyle is the better goal for us and our kids, and the core of that, says Taylor, is a healthy relationship with food. "Our relationship with food is hugely significant," she states, "because we are with food constantly." The ever-present focus on food in American culture, combined with conflicting cultural messages to both indulge and to be unrealistically thin, can cause kids to feel confused about food and their bodies, and may eventually lead to obsessive dieting or secretive eating.

In light of this, Taylor says it's crucial for parents to examine their own relationship with food and to model healthy attitudes for their kids: "You want to encourage a relationship with food that is open and honest--not having to hide what you eat or what you think around food."

If parents notice potentially dangerous changes in their child's eating, fear may provoke them to force the child to eat or to verbally attack their behaviors. But, says Taylor, "Trying to control [the child's] food and their eating will only make them become more defensive and controlling of their eating. To attack is to create defensiveness."

A better approach is to initiate an open and honest dialogue. "Talk to them about what they feel about food, about their bodies, and about their sexuality," Taylor says, noting how frequently eating disorders coincide with sexual development.

If symptoms do become clear--drastic weight loss, altered eating habits, obsessive dieting or secretive eating--parents should seek help immediately. Eating disorders are serious conditions with serious consequences and can even lead to death. Treatment varies, but nutrition counseling and individual or group therapy for the patient and family may be in order.

For the parents, facing an eating disorder has its own challenges. Parents may experience feelings of guilt and helplessness. Taylor encourages them to seek individual counseling or attend a family group with their child. "Talk to someone," she says. The strain of coping with a child's eating disorder is something parents should never face alone.

For help with eating disorders, visit: www.edreferral.com or www.something-fishy.com.